Tuesday, September 30, 2008

The End of The End (A New Beginning)

All right. Is two years a long enough mourning period? Is one year the typical amount? Then I doubled it to accommodate two parental losses within four months, and since Mother went last and today marks two years since her demise, I'm done, right?

As of 11:42 AM, I'm officially done. Out of mourning. Finished with the Black Period. Through with being in a lifeless limbo.

My life must go on now. I love my parents, I miss them every day, but I cannot continue playing the role of "that poor girl who lost both of her parents four months apart, so sad". I cannot continue living in the limbo of inheritances that have yet to materialize, of estates that languish and lollygag around, of waiting for things to fall into place before making crucial life decisions, of time standing immortally frozen in a house that still resembles a storage unit/memorial.

My role is being redefined.

Who am I now?

I'll let you know as I figure it out.

Mother, please rest in peace now, along with Dad, knowing that I am safe, learning to be happy, and will eternally hold you both in my heart. Until we meet on the other side...


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4 Comments:

At 8:15 PM, October 01, 2008, Blogger Sheepish Annie said...

I think you mourn for as long as you need to. And if you are ready to face the world and find a new way to be in it, then more power to you!

Beginnings are really rather exciting, aren't they?

 
At 9:07 PM, October 12, 2008, Blogger Carson said...

thank you for visiting my blog Jeanne, I'm glad I was able to inject a little happiness into this sombre time for you.
And I'm sooo glad you love that Hues Corporation song too! Thanks for the lyric..i've always wondered what that line was :)

 
At 5:02 PM, October 23, 2008, Blogger Christy said...

I agree with Sheepish Annie, you mourn as long as you need to and when the time is right, you begin to come out of it. Hang in there and thanks for the kind words on my blog. :) Glad to know that you are feeling so much better.s

 
At 6:19 PM, October 30, 2008, Blogger Mia said...

::hug:: I needed to hear what you had to say...

but I dont' think you can put a time limit on how much is "enough" time to grieve. You'll get there when you can, and so will I.

 

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