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Wednesday, April 08, 2009

Food

Milk. One gallon. W*l-M*art. $1.88/gallon.

I bought four.

Yes, I can drink that much by the 19th. Easily.

Cool beans. That beats C*rcle K's 2/$5 special anyday. Though I like their milk a bit better.

But of course I would. Because according to the quiz at New York Time Out:

Your Score: 43

You’re a Discerning Diner. You know what you like and it often includes gussied-up grub. But you’re just as happy scarfing a Papaya Dog any day of the week.

(What's a Papaya Dog? It sounds more like something I'd be barfing up...)

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Tuesday, April 07, 2009

An Explanation

OK. Before I go offending anyone with it, I feel the Chipped In Widgets to the right over there might need an explanation.

It's true. I'm begging for dollars. I am my own charity. But there is a reason for this, and it has less to do with drumming up donations than it does with activating the Law of Attraction.

My intent with this is to reach out to the Universe to let it know that I'm serious about my goals. I know I've wavered between YES Parelli Instructor NO Parelli Instructor, but after months of self-analysis, it's obvious that although I love playing with string, writing/recording music, and writing period, my deepest most profound passion, the one that makes me cry sometimes just thinking about it, is my horses. (Yarn is lovely, but it doesn't move me to tears.)

When I think about my life and about what I'll miss when I'm gone one day, horses pop up first. If there aren't horses in heaven, I am not going. They are the one thing that make my heart hurt. The thought of never feeling their soft breath on my skin; of never smelling that intoxicating blend of horse hair, manure, hay and sweat; of never hearing the gentle nicker when I enter the barn; of never experiencing the feeling of flying without wings as we canter down the trail through a wooded forest; to never again feel that mystical connection with this most magnificent and amazing creature as we play at Liberty in an open field, with my horse eagerly mirroring my every move and staying with me of his own free will when he could just as easily whirl away...

Excuse me for a moment...

OK. I had to collect myself.

What I'm doing is trying to generate energy by putting a blatant request out there—aimed at the Universe, not necessarily at people. I'm certainly asking for more than I'd need but they say to do that to ensure you get what you need. You, dear reader, don't have to participate unless you want to. My intent is not to milk the pockets of my readers; but to declare a VISIBLE intent that says, I AM DOING THIS: Universe, back me up on my goal.

It might generate some finances toward my dream; it might not. The funds might arrive in a way totally unrelated to the fundraising widgets. The point is to open myself up to the possibilities and get it OUT there.

And there's no way I'd know if it would work, unless I took the risk.

But on the off-chance that there are those who read this blog, are supportive of my dreams, understand what I've been going through and might have the means to assist, I've decided to put it there. It's for them, the Universe and myself.

Lest you think I'm one to sit back and live off of the generosity of others, let me remind you that I'm doing absolutely EVERYTHING to get myself back on track. Including starting an online yarn business, launching a personal fundraising effort, pursuing alternate routes to eliminating the two extra houses I got stuck with in this estate/death deal AND applying for jobs from Marketing Director to Kwik Stop Parking Lot Attendant. After that, it's all up to God.

This is my dream, and I am doing EVERYTHING in my power, offensive or not, to make it happen.

If my fundraising efforts offend you, please just ignore them, and come back for all the news that's fit to Knit. And to canter away with.

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Sunday, April 05, 2009

Just A Bunch of Random Thoughts

FIBERS
Right now, I'm crocheting rather than knitting, and dyeing yarn rather than buying yarn. So there isn't a lot to show at present. The crochet project is Damknit's Ugly Blanket, which I didn't think was ugly at all. I emailed her about the pattern, played around with color combinations in PhotoShop as usual (or FreeHand, I forget which), bought the yarn (Ack, last year), and started in on it. Mine is in fall colors: brick red, forest green, pumpkin orange, pale yellow accented with a variegate in those fall colors, and bordered in deep coffee brown.

It'll be awhile.

HORSES
I've been playing with my horse now that the weather is nicer, and preparing to FINALLY videotape our Parelli Level Two Audition so I can submit them before the May 1 deadline. It's free until then; afterwards, a fee will be charged. They haven't said how much that might be, and I'm all for free, so...

The Parelli organization made some changes to how the program materials and assessments are being handled—I was ready to tape last fall, but in light of the changes, I opted to wait. I'm glad I did. Now, I merely need to put on some music and play with my horse for up to 10 minutes each (Online "groundwork" and Freestyle "riding"), and include a few compulsories. Much easier in some ways than the old task-based assessment.

The former Level Two Assessment to include 25 tasks that HAD to be shown. The downside was, you could be great at all but one task, have stelllar L2++++ skills, but that one task would hold you back from getting your blue string (like karate belts). The upside was, you could tape each task in order, edit the tape, and go at your own pace.

The new Level Two Audition is more lenient. You show off what you CAN do, make sure you can do the handful of compulsories, and the staff watches to see how you handle things when they go awry, how you relate to your horse, how your horse responds to you—it's more about relationships than tasks. The downside is... for those who like checklists, it's daunting to put together a plan and just go for it. The upside is, it's only 10 minutes for each Savvy (Online, Freestyle, Liberty, Finesse) and for Level Two, it only covers the first two Savvys. If there is anything that you shouldoughta be able to do, but isn't a compulsory, but can't quite do yet, you don't have to show it. And, they can rate you at beyond L2. Instead of being limited to just passing L2, you could, if you really demonstrate profound skillz, get a L3 pass in that Savvy. You can be L4 in one Savvy, L3 in another, and solid L2 in the others.

I like that.

I don't like that I only have until May 1 to get this done. Especially with a horse who has suddenly decided to have other plans. (Don't get me started about yesterday's play session.)

EMPLOYMENT (*snort*)
I've also been looking for a job in between. Dudes, there are plenty of graphic design jobs.

In FLORIDA.

Bit of a commute, that.

I've come to the frightening realization that NW Ohio is void of any job that my skill set would fit into. If I want to work, I need to move. But I can't afford to move until I get a job and make enough money to afford to move. Catch-22, anyone? And the estate has to close, houses have to sell because I refuse to add a third vacant house to the list, thankyouverymuch.

The other three Ohio quadrants have more jobs than we do. This is so wrong. Short of flipping burgers, my options are limited.

Just for fun, while nosing around on Monster Dot Cahm, I plugged in "veterinary" and let it search the entire US. There was one awesome job I wish I could take. It's a Patient Care Manager at a major equine diagnostic hospital. It sounds SO awesome, and the pay is great and the hours would allow me to have the earlier part free for horseplay. But it's in Massachusetts.

BIG SIGH.

MY NUMBER ONE GOAL
It's made me realize one thing, though. It's a definite on the career change. I'm through with graphic design. Let's just admit, I made a mistake going into it. I like the creative part, but I don't like the job. Honestly, if my most excited reaction to a potential graphics-related job is merely that for once I don't feel like vomiting as I read the description, doesn't that say something?

I want to do something that allows me to work with animals—especially training and care, but not directly surgical (or lab rat stuff)—and/or to write, and in a sense "minister" to people. I'm very big on promoting positive thought and alternative perspectives—part of the reason the Parelli thing is so appealing. When I watch shows like Dog Whisperer, DogTown, Animal Cops and of course my Parelli stuff, I get all worked up inside. Something says, "I'd love to do something like that with my life". I'd love to help make this a better world for the animals and the people who love them.

Apparently, it might be a bit of a stretch trying to do it in NW Ohio, especially if I think I need to make actual income from it, without further education.

FAITH
This has been such a transitional time for me. I'm also trying to find a church that fits my personal dogma—you'd think it would be easy, but when confronted with Church of this and United that... it's confusing! Every single denomination views things a bit differently, and has a different way of going about it. I know one thing. It has to be liberal. I might be straight, but any church I'd belong to MUST have a very progressive stance on homosexuality, abortion (right to choose), family, women's roles, etc. I'm very much about acceptance and tolerance, even if I don't personally partake in certain activities.

If I can wear jeans and tennis shoes to the service and/or it's more contemporary, all the better. This month, once the Big Holiday is out of the way, I'm going to start checking out options. If anyone has a suggestion, comment or email me.

That's all for now. Just didn't want y'all to think I'd run away. I haven't. Yet! LOL!

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